Shine the Divine:

Creativity IS a Spiritual Practice

When we see through our hearts, we recognize that every single one of us is infused with creativity. Divine Sparks are embedded in everyone and everything. It's up to us to be courageous, to look and listen deeply, to find the sparks, gather and release them back into the universe, transformed into something new. Join me as we wake up to the sacred-ordinary blessings waiting to greet us each and every day.


Thursday, May 20, 2010

Through A Veil of Tender Seeds

I went from clear reflections and feeling fine last week to veiled perceptions this week. That's kind of how it is with MS I suppose...well life in general really. We all have good weeks, when we feel energized and clear and then there are weeks, days, moments when life is fuzzy and a bit off kilter. I have been experiencing vertigo, vision that blurs on and off and a sense of being out of body again since Monday morning. The sensations are akin to having too much to drink, only there is no alcohol involved...just my brain acting wonky. I kept thinking it would just go away so waited until today to call my doctor. She requested some blood-work be drawn this afternoon. I'm hoping it's just one of those things that will indeed clear up on its own without IV steroids. Our MS walk is on Saturday and I don't want to be out of commission receiving solumedrol at home (although I do appreciate the convenience of having a home-health nurse come out instead of going to the hospital for these things) when I could be enjoying the company of my family and friends as we journey along together through lovely Hanover, NH. I know the gang will go on without me if I have to be home, but it's not the way we planned it. It's kind of interesting to add that my doctor is walking the same MS fundraiser and one of our friends participating on our team is a physician, so I'm planning to go, dizzy in my wheelchair as long as I don't have to receive steroids this weekend. Unlike the kind athletes take to boost their strength, the ones I take shut down my immune system and leave me feeling week and crappy for a couple of weeks. And well, we have a Bat Mitzvah in about 5 weeks, so really, I don't have time for this illness nonsense!!! And so, my friends, that is why todays SkyWatch picture is through the veil of tender seeds and at an odd angle looking up. Ironically, this week was Shavuot, the Jewish holiday of receiving Torah...I guess the Torah I received this week (as this is an ongoing process, really) is to slow down and accept what is given moment to moment, whether I'm feeling fine and clear or fuzzy and a bit unbalanced...and to have patience with my body and all things that are not in my control (which is basically everything). Life is unpredictable and wonky and there is a clarity in knowing this and trusting that I can feel safe and love the mystery even when I am not feeling particularly strong. Sorry if this blog entry is a bit of a ramble, but, well, you can imagine why it is so.

To view spectacular SkyWatch posts around the world please click the button below

Skywatch Friday

You can still contribute to the MS Journey of Hope Walk by going to: Rosewillow's Meandering Messangers


  1. You are apologizing?

    I am sorry I am not half as good at being a human as you.

    and the photo is so cool.

    I really wish you felt better. Really.

  2. Que sera sera, as they say! Wishing you the best!

  3. Laura, your post wasn't rambling or anything close to it. I do hope you get to go and enjoy the MS walk with your friends and family. I thought your choice of shot was perfect for what you're currently experiencing. I hope that dizzy out-of-self feeling doesn't linger for you.

  4. Do hope you feel better for the Walk on Saturday. I know how important it is to you and I'll be thinking of you.

  5. It's a beautiful photograph that says as much as your words. I hope you're feeling better soon and are able to be at the MS walk.

  6. You have been on my mind all week. The photo with this post is wonderful, looking up through a veil of what is still to come, seeds of the promise that life goes on even as the flower fades.

  7. This post was lovely, even though it makes me sad to hear you have not had one of your best weeks.
    I always admire your strength and determination and take a great inspiration from it.
    Have a lovely weekend,

  8. you don't have to apologize. the important thing is that you're living it out the best way you can. I admire your resilience. It's actually an inspiration to us. have a good week! My skywatch is here.

  9. Dear Laura, I like to read you. I feel the sensation that u are close to me. And u write phrases that I love...and gives me HOPE.
    Simply cause the life, Dear laura, isnt ONLY colored...or ONLY black and white but EACH PERSON NEEDS TO UNDERSTAND A TRUE: We live difficulties moments...but another people live more bad than us

    For example: the refugee children In Mozambique...I fight for them, Laura, cause I know....they dont have nothing and I HAVE ALl, cause my children are with good health, have good education, foods, etc...
    I have visited Africa 9 times...I have visited 7 refugee center...and I published a book about the refugee children in Mozambique.
    Now, I will do an exhibition in Sweden. And I will colect some money to buy a small house to 8 children from Rwanda. I cant save the World...but I can help to change the life of 8...

    Have a nice day and congrats for sharing

  10. I like the way sharon expressed it...
    Fingers crossed for the weekend (((hugs)))) xx

  11. Fun photo and way to view the sky, and good for you to decide to get on with living the best life you can, wishing you a great weekend.

  12. Anazing shot!
    Enjoy the weekend.

  13. hoping for you the gentle breeze needed to lift that veil and scatter those tender seeds where they need to go .... gentle breeze first - then clarity .... it will come

  14. Your photos speak of your expressions and feeling.

    The walk must go the saying goes. I hope things will be better for you this weekend.


    My new "home": Deranged Insanity.

  15. Laura, I am praying that you do not have to have the steroid treatment and that you are able to walk(roll:)) alongside of your family this weekend. May God provide you with the strength to enjoy this day and all that your soon-to-be Bat Mitzvah daughter has achieved!

    And just to let you know, dear friend, even when you are feeling wonky, you make more sense than 99.9% of the people I know!

    Wonderful photo, very wise words!

    Love you, dear one!
    Shabbat Shalom,

  16. this is so true and worded so lovely: Life is unpredictable and wonky and there is a clarity in knowing this and trusting that I can feel safe and love the mystery even when I am not feeling particularly strong.

    I like how you use photography to reflect how you are feeling. Sending energy.

  17. hi Laura, i hope the dizziness has eased and you enjoy a wonderful weekend : ) much love and hugs to you. sue xx

  18. Laura,
    You are so wonderfully wise and you always inspire me onward. I love what you say about life being so wonky and unpredictable. There IS some comfort in that. I completely understand. That's how I felt (and feel) since I finally stopped grasping with the notion of impermanence. Weirdly, I finally found comfort within that knowing that nothing can truly be known, predictable, unchanging. Fancy that....I do hope you continue to feel better. Keep the faith! xo

  19. Of course you were not rambling, Laura. You have a gift for making very good sense.

    I hope you were able to feel better withour steroids and are generally feeling better.

    Please feel my healing hugs across the miles to you.


  20. I hope you are doing better today, dear one.

  21. Thinking of you, Laura, and hoping all is well...

  22. I hope you were able to go on the walk, Laura!

    Sorry I'm late getting around but it was a long weekend in Canada so we visited relatives in Upstate NY for a few days.

  23. You really are the epitome of Grace, Laura. You seem to handle all of these upheavals with such a gentle spirit.

    I do hope you were able to make it for your walk on Saturday.


  24. Laura,
    Eager to hear how the Walk went! I hope you let us know soon. Thinking of you with love and gratitude.

  25. Don't worry, you post wasn't a ramble :o)I hope you are feeling better and that you were able to attend the walk, my prayers are with you.

  26. Laura, how are u?
    its happening something there?

    Nice day

  27. thinking of you and hoping the veil has been lifted... not have your vision be clear, and feeling sensations akin to drinking can not be easy in any way... I hope you were able to attend your walk, but if not, I know your spirit was there and being carried through out.
    I saw a story about ms patients being helped by Ampyra, for addressing patient's walking and balance. you probably know all about it, but thought i'd mention it, since you've spoken about your walking difficulties.
    be well, sending love, Karin


Bright Sparks: