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When we see through our hearts, we recognize that every single one of us is infused with creativity. Divine Sparks are embedded in everyone and everything. It's up to us to be courageous, to look and listen deeply, to find the sparks, gather and release them back into the universe, transformed into something new. Join me as we wake up to the sacred-ordinary blessings waiting to greet us each and every day.

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Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Clear, Near and Present

Edge of Light 21


Hineni. You asked
and I woke up to reply.
Ayeka? Right here.

Where are you? You knew
but I did not, do not
always remember.

Hineni. With You.
I am here with You right Now.
And You never leave.

Ayeka? I call
because sometimes I forget
sometimes, I forget.

It pierced the 5am darkness. Not shrill, but clear; a single note repeated at regular intervals. Maybe a minute apart? Sleepy thought: A shofar? That made no sense. An owl. But a shofar did make sense on this day between Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur; the Days of Awe. And I felt awed. Every time I wake up to the ethereal voice of an owl in the woods (it has happened 3 times now) in the earliest morning hour, just as dawn's light is emerging, I feel a deep sense of awe in knowing that such a creature lives just beyond my window, nestled somewhere in the tall trees. We have lived in this house for 10 years and it is only in recent months that I have heard this particular wake up call rising from the darkness. And I wonder. What is it I need to wake up from? And my immediate response to my own question is: Not from, but to! What do I need to wake up to? Well awe of course. Awe in awareness of the Creator, the spark, the incomprehensible beginning of all Beginning-ness, Being-ness, the Mystery I can neither understand nor explain, yet somehow Know beyond reason.

Awe for the beauty, the bounty, the blessings that surround me, fill me and sustain me each day. And gratitude. Every time I wake up and realize that I am indeed AWAKE, it is with gratitude.

And then I fall asleep again and forget about gratitude. Forget about awe. Fear creeps in with longing, doubt, worry, suffering...sometimes with stealth and sometimes stumbling blindly into my closed eyes, ears, mind and heart. The clarity of a single owl calling through this darkness seems far away, vague, barely-audible, impossible to believe. And then it is near again. Not a wail, not a ghostly sound in the night, nor a shofar's blast that vibrates my bones. A soft sound, a whisper I must intentionally listen for. Yet it is clear and near and present. And I am present to the Presence infusing a moment. A particular moment in which I am awake. Ayeka? God asks. Where are you? Here I am. Hineni.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

אַיֶּכָּה When God calls out to Adam in the garden after Adam and Eve ate fruit from the tree of knowledge He says: "Where are you?" "ayeka?" Genesis 3:9

Adam and Eve are hiding, and of course God knows exactly where they are, but they are frightened. Perhaps on a deeper level they do NOT know where they are (spiritually speaking) because they are afraid. Our fear can bring us closer to God's Presence or hide our God consciousness from us.


הִנֵּנִי Abraham is filled with God awareness, when God calls out to him, simply saying his name "Abraham." Abraham responds without hesitation: "Here I am." "hineni" Genesis 22:1

This is also significant to my post because it is sourced in the telling of the Akeda....the binding of Isaac. Ultimately as the story unfolds, God provides a ram (a shofar is a ram's horn) for sacrifice and Isaac is spared. Abraham was awake and listening for God's Presence.





16 comments:

  1. laura - please check out our website: www.ayeka.org.il - might resonate with you. aryeh

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  2. Aryeh, thank you! I will pass your link along to friends and family! I am eager to explore your site!

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  3. I love the shift in meaning when you say what should I wake up from? to what should I wake up to? . . . it makes all the difference in the world! Shifting perspective from negative to positive . . . Blessings xo

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  4. thank you lola...I think by consciously shifting out perspective we can begin to change the world. Don't you?

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  5. Thank you Laura, for 2 more words. Ayeka. Hineni.

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  6. oh my, Laura. It is so beautiful to reconnect with you again.. Reading you today is balm for my heart. Thank you so much for finding me again, and for reaching out your loving hand.

    big hug...

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  7. Laura, this was beautiful. And your awareness of the moments and the messages in them is even more so...

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  8. A very nice movement of haikus. And I can always come here to find direction to a peaceful place. Thank you for providing that.

    Judy

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  9. Owls signify wisdom. I think you are wise in the way you've reframed the question, What do I need to wake up to? Then you are in a place to hear the answer.

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  10. lovely Laura, thankyou for gifting us with some soulspace thoughts today

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  11. Oh Laura, what a wonderful post! I will try to remember to wake up to awe every morning, and to be joyful just to BE in this amazing world.
    xo

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  12. Beautiful beautiful words...thank you. Hineni repeated over and over helped me through a hospital stay...I knew I was heard.

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  13. This is so beautiful. I, too, hear owls in the night, but have never thought about their haunting calls in this way. Thank you for giving me new ears for this.

    In yoga the other day the teacher said, "You are right here, right now," after a particularly difficult pose. It's been with me since. This post just expands that for me.

    Thank you.

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  14. Laura,

    Beautifully said. What do we need to wake up to? Indeed, what? I'd like to think it is to my true nature which is boundless goodness, love, peace, joy, and more. Unconditional friendliness to myself and all beings. It is so easy to be blinded to this, to fall prey to the overculture and put a mask on disguise ourselves in false garments. I love your awakening, every woman's, and am especially grateful for my own. Sitting at the dinner table with my husband we often say, out of the blue, I am so glad that I am awake!

    And it goes without say that we can always wake up to more, with more clarity and heart. For there are layers and layers of be-ing within us and boundless notions and experiences of love - and awe and wonder as you point out here.

    We do not have owls here, very rarely, but we get the piercing cry of a fox now and then. It definitely shakes one into awareness.

    With boundless love to you today. Hope you are well and resting up after the big trip. xo

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  15. "what do i need to wake up to?"

    beautiful. i like the way you shifted there.. perspective has been coming up a lot for me these past days.. i'm now asking the question..and listening..

    hugs.. xx

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