Shine the Divine:

Creativity IS a Spiritual Practice

When we see through our hearts, we recognize that every single one of us is infused with creativity. Divine Sparks are embedded in everyone and everything. It's up to us to be courageous, to look and listen deeply, to find the sparks, gather and release them back into the universe, transformed into something new. Join me as we wake up to the sacred-ordinary blessings waiting to greet us each and every day.

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Monday, October 18, 2010

bright and blue and everything in between

 
 from my archive

of all things, of ALL things! I cannot find the battery charger for my camera!!!! And the light outside is amazing this morning...AMAZING!!!! I feel so frustrated. It's my fault. I had it last. I moved it...put it down somewhere (safe, ha, ha) and now, well...I can't find it!!!!

when things like this happen (which is more and more often) I wonder...is it just because I'm of a certain age? (45) or is it because MS is sucking away my short-term memory. Maybe both. Probably both. Can't it just be a normal thing...do YOU guys put stuff down and forget where you left it?
The good news of course, is that without my camera I can just sit quietly and take in the light, the colors of the world beyond my windows....I can simply be with it...as is...no view finder...nothing to do, just be, see, enjoy, breathe and feel gratitude for this simplicity.

still, it is annoying!!!! I love my cheap little camera and how great I feel when I find a perfect (at least to my heart/eye/mind/soul) shot! Wow, is it an addiction? Am I addicted to my love of photography???? Are some addictions good? Like a desire to see and share what you see with others? Maybe not an addiction. Maybe it's just LOVE. I LOVE to see the world through my blessed artist eyes...I LOVE that even though I don't have an expensive camera I can still manage to take some gorgeous photos...because I'm gifted at seeing...because the WORLD is so DAMNED beautiful...but today, today I feel bright and happy because it is so gorgeous outside...I feel that joy deep in my bones, my essence, my soul...and I feel blue for the loss of this silly charger.

And you know, I've looked, the kids have looked, Gord has looked....it must be hiding in plain sight...wow I am going on and on...so now I'll finish my sandwich and breathe. and get ready to go to pt for the day.

and my knight in shining arms of love said he would go out and get me a new charger later today....KNIGHT? He's a PRINCE!

I am grateful for the blue sky above, the sun filtering through the leaves and boughs and laying patches of light upon the ground in patterns that just light ME up! I am grateful for a sandwich with soy turkey and organic 9 grain bread and mayo and a tomato from the garden Rosie planted with her grandfather. I am grateful to the sweet woman who will be driving me to PT today. I am grateful that Jimmy will be there when I arrive to help strengthen my body so I can learn to walk better again. I am grateful for my dog Ellie, patiently waiting for me to share my sandwich. I am grateful for the chickadees who just descended like fallen leaves outside my window...and the tiny chipmunk fooling around out there too. For the blue jay who keeps diving in and out of my line of vision. For the breeze blowing the trees and the grass that is just a bit too long in the backyard, which I LOVE because it is catching the light perfectly. I am grateful for my PRINCE and the new charger he will bring home later tonight.

I am grateful to all of you who are indulging me in my rambling rants and thoughts.
I am grateful.

I feel chesed (kindness)
I feel rachamim (compassion)
I feel simcha (joy)
I feel shalom (peace)
I feel shalem (whole)

and still a little bummed about my camera...I'm just saying.
I truly believe it's healthy to hold it all...the ease and the frustration.

gentle steps

Laura

15 comments:

  1. its just Love, i think.

    sometimes it good to not take the camera, and be the camera. your words are like a camera too--

    its Sooo beautiful here today too.

    ( i was wondering the other day where do all the teaspoons go ? maybe they're on the moon... with lost socks and other things we've forgotten to look for. ; )

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  2. I forget the "safe" places I put things, too. And I don't have MS. Just sayin'.

    As for your list, I love it. Especially the part about your dog Ellie waiting for a bit of your sandwich : )

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  3. Love you - when you posted your age - I thought - I could be your mother :) Here you are encouraging me all the time and I write and tell you how thankful I am to have found you online.
    Have a wonderful rest of the day.
    Soon you will have a camera !!

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  4. Oh Laura... I know how it is when we misplace stuff! Once I was looking frantically for my keys, and after a while I realized they were... "in my hand all along, Dorothy!" A good remedy for all of us who are affected by that is slowing down and fully "arriving" in the moment, which can be easy to blink right through it. And..what a gift to be able to be present and witness mother nature's heavenly slide-show, captured in the camera of your heart.

    wonderous blessings dear, sweet Laura.

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  5. i gave up on battery chargers! i always keep an extra ready to go battery in my case...

    and yes, at 65, i put down stuff and sometimes they never reappear.....like my favorite earrings and glasses from earlier this summer. expensive little bits out there somewhere, hopefully someone else enjoying the gorgeous turquoise dangles...better than thinking they were dropped on a street and crushed by a car. just 'saying'....

    meanwhile, cause to find another almost equal pair from the same artist in taos this summer.

    photography, addictive...gets me, and keeps me...going all the time.

    good to HEAR your fiesty voice out there !!
    rant on!

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  6. Fret not about misplacing your battery charger -- that's normal. Start to worry when you forget what the battery charger is meant to do! Beautiful word pictures -- who needed a photo?
    Peace,
    Muff

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  7. hope that you find everything you need and get what you deserve.
    awesome reflections.

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  8. I'm so lifted by how you turned your frustration over not being able to find your battery charger into a list of all the things you're grateful for! What a beautiful practice.

    And perhaps by the time I've written this your Prince will have brought you a new one. And, if in the meantime you found the old one, perfect! It means you'll have an extra one the next time you can't find it again.

    Shalom.

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  9. Love is a wonderful thing to ramble about :o) I often leave things in 'safe' places and then forget where I left them, so don't worry, it's not just you!

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  10. hello lovely, yes..the age does it to us..43 and am starting to put more and more things in safe places..although..i lost my mobile phone one day and found it in the fridge..milk was still by the kettle hmmmn :o)


    "...and still a little bummed about my camera...I'm just saying.
    I truly believe it's healthy to hold it all...the ease and the frustration."

    very healthy:) and the pic from your archive is gorgeous..but even without it..or other pics..from your writing you offer us a glimpse of what you see..and it's beautiful.

    you know Laura, whenever you drop by gw..even if you just leave one of your smiles..i feel hugged..and i feel the same from reading your posts. regardless of what you are going through you give so much love, gentle lady.. xx

    {{{a big hug to you}}}

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  11. Oh, it is frustrating to misplace something you really need to have. I've had a terrible time keeping track of papers in this house, so I have designated certain places for certain papers. They still pile up but piles I can manage:) Hopefully you will be "charged" and ready to "click" soon.

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  12. You know you will have found that charger by the time your Prince gets back!
    Your positive attitude and outlook are fabulous Laura. I am so glad you are feeling happy and bright today.
    Cheers,
    Karen

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  13. Keep the receipt! You know your old charger is around somewhere - maybe in your purse? Under a magazine/chair cushion/sofa? It will turn up. On the other hand, having a spare is not a bad thing!

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  14. 47... and my stuff doesn't even get as far as the 'safe' place before i don't know what i've done with it... at least you've got an excuse! Sometimes i even check the rubbish bin just in case i've lost something i don't know about yet, lol.

    Was sat today thinking pity i forgot my camera, then decided actually it's nice just to sit and see... and it's the eye behind the lens, not the camera that makes a good photographer.. so i reckon you qualify! It was blogging that got me photographing & the bug has certainly bitten.
    love & hugs xx

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  15. I love the distinction you've made here between addiction and love. :-)

    Sometimes it's good to just be and not be able to do anything else.

    As for losing things - all the time, including my car in large parking lots.

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