Shine the Divine:

Creativity IS a Spiritual Practice

When we see through our hearts, we recognize that every single one of us is infused with creativity. Divine Sparks are embedded in everyone and everything. It's up to us to be courageous, to look and listen deeply, to find the sparks, gather and release them back into the universe, transformed into something new. Join me as we wake up to the sacred-ordinary blessings waiting to greet us each and every day.

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Thursday, April 21, 2011

One By One, They Must Leave The Nest



you imagined this day would come. the one in which your little chick would stretch her wings and test them (and you)...hopping closer to the edge of the nest…




and then the college tours begin. and suddenly you visualize more clearly than ever your daughter blanketed beneath the great sky and the shadow of a distant mountain…because you are here. she is here. your hands lay limp on your lap, useless to hold her back now, as you sit in your wheelchair on a cold, damp gray afternoon in a field not so far from home, but far enough. you are listening to the music of her voice, chatting as she grins (yes your typically awkward in new social settings, but oh so beautiful daughter)... chatting away with anthropology students and professors about life on campus, the small classes (that you know would suit her well)...


...they describe the atlatl team (click the link....i didn’t know this word either)…and invite her to try her aim…

 


…her smile could light the world on this dreary day, while she is seemingly unaware of the nearness of feathers; you frame her face through them from your seated vantage point. (this the daughter with the bird/feather phobia typically overwhelmed by panic in the presence of birds and feathers in general - ever since she was a toddler!)
 


...and they show her plaster skulls and books and real bones aligned on a shelf (a dream come true for a girl fascinated by forensics and the human story!) 




...and tomorrow she will be on a plane on her way to paris (oui, FRANCE)…her first time abroad, with her french class from high school…quite literally flying from our nest for the very first time without a family member accompanying her. she will not see the dawn through our woods, but from above the clouds.





nor will she wake up to cuddle our darling poodle (poodles are NOT of french origin, did you know that? they were first bred in germany).



but when i see the sun rising through the trees...the sun with her two illusory daughter orbs...i will be the sun, kissing not one but both of my girls good morning...in my heart, in my mind...even though in reality one will be soaring across the sea, and one will be shuffling into my bedroom with sleepy eyes to hug me. 

this letting go is hard.

linking to:
Happy Easter to all of my Christian friends! We are enjoying a beautiful Passover so far.

Skywatch Friday


45 comments:

  1. Yes I know how that feels! Happiness and sadness all churning together, pride and fear. Phew, it's exhausting... Today looms with blue skies, for a change, hope you have sunshine as well. Lois

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  2. This was SO beautiful! Thank you for sharing such a wonderful moment. My little guy is 13 and I can't begin to imagine....

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  3. oh hunny, the bitter-sweet of motherhood, to raise them to be 'adult', to in actual fact leave home. and when they can, and do, you want to hold them back with all your might...

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  4. well, i am crying over this one... so beautiful and so true.

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  5. Dearest Laura,

    I have been away from here too long, but I have thought of you often, dear one. This beautiful, beautiful post has brought me to tears, because as you know, I have had to learn to let go lately too. We mothers cannot truly be sad, for we know it is for the best. But it is still so hard, this letting go of a piece of our heart. . .

    Love and hugs,
    xoxoxo
    Angela

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  6. I feel your pain of letting go since I have been through this also. It does take time but it is nice to see them as young adults also....eventually. You wrote beautifully about the process

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  7. altho i'm not a mother, i can only imagine how difficult this part must be...

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  8. This was so beautiful, Laura...I felt your mother-love pouring through every word and image... "your hands lay limp on your lap, useless to hold her back now"...wow...

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  9. Such a poignant post. Yes, this is a hard passage for mothers. And what a beautiful daughter! Life opening before her. Your bond is strong, you have raised her well and she will be okay. But I know this passage: a very hard one for us moms. The little dog will miss her too - and she will miss home for a time, till she gets used to this big change. Lucky girl, going to Paris! A wonderful adventure.

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  10. Oh, Laura, your daughter is gorgeous and beautiful credit to you.

    It is hard to watch them test their wings, but once you adjust to the idea of their solo flights, it's an incredible sight to behold.

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  11. Such beautiful words! I can only imagine what it will be like. It tugs on my heart strings knowing that someday I will have to let mine go as well. It will be here to fast I'm sure :(
    And Paris?! She will have so much fun! Can't wait to hear how her trip went!

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  12. Beautiful Belin, beautiful mother, beautiful post. It took me back to when my own children took flight from our nest. Thank you for this post.

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  13. Beautiful daughter, talented, and full of life's promise!

    Letting go is hard but you have done it.

    She will return, a daughter's a daughter for life!

    Very moving most.

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  14. The Atlatl link was interesting. They learn from us and then we learn from them! As always, thanks for sharing.

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  15. Hiya Laura,

    It never gets any easier, does it?
    So lovely, so full of hope.
    But she will go on contributing to your life, in a different way.

    Are you thinking back to when you were in her shoes?
    The things I wish I had said then... not knowing, nor realizing.

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  16. I am deeply touched by all of the thoughtful comments...and I know there is no way I will get back to everyone to thank you personally...so I'm thanking you now! MUCH PACKING TO DO as soon as Belin gets home from school!!!
    xo
    L

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  17. Thank you for your beautiful and touching post...I remember that time well, my only child/daughter fledging.
    Thank you for sharing and have a beautiful weekend.
    Smiles and blessings

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  18. A very moving post, Laura, and it is hard to see them go! I felt the same way with all four of mine! Beautiful skies and a glorious way to begin the day! Wishing you and your family a very Blessed and Happy Easter!

    Sylvia

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  19. Yes, Laura, the letting go is indeed hard. Tears come to my eyes when I remember when I too had to let go. I wish you well!

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  20. A lovely series of photos - and how exciting for our daughter... off to Paris, lucky girl! :D

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  21. Laura your daughter is so gorgeous. And I could feel the words you put in here. I may not be the biological mother of my nieces and nephew but I love them as my own. When my first niece spread her wings I don't have sleep I wanted to still be with me but she has to learned. What I only pray and hope that she will be always protected and that all I have thought her she will remember and that I am always here for her, forever! Happy weekend!

    Kim

    SWF

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  22. I know how you feel!
    Wonderful post and photos.
    A blessed weekend.
    Cheers and regards.
    Regina

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  23. hat a beautiful daughter and I know how you feel. We all do I think

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  24. Oh God Laura it's hard to find words to console you... for i am already afraid of that day when my 8 year old goes away.
    but if you are the sun shining at her side she'll always be there for you to cuddle, and you have your other one... and she'll be back and you'll celebrate and realize again... that it's life! So they say,'remember when you were their age...' and they are right- cycles are repeated, it's at the side of the pendulum we are which is not always so nice.

    Great post and photos- smile at spring time.

    :-)

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  25. My heart is just melted after reading your post. I can relate to every word. Letting go is incredibly hard.
    Beautiful post!
    I love the first photo very much.

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  26. Such a bittersweet moment, and one I've been through. My youngest has only one year left at home.

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  27. You are letting go of a child Laura, which is so difficult. But she will return to you a young woman, and new experiences will abound for you both with her new found independence and maturity.
    Cheers

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  28. You are a loving and beautiful mom. I hope her adventure in Paris is wonderful. This is a heart-warming post. Thank you. God bless.

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  29. Oh Laura, You made me cry. Your post was so beautifully worded, and I do know exactly what you are feeling. I've already been there once with my daughter when she left for college at KU. I was lucky and she actually came back and has been here at home for the last year. Next month she, again, will be leaving for Kansas City to start 3 years of school to become a Physical Therapist. Such a sad time, but what a wonderful, new experience for both of them. Such is life. Have a wonderful Easter weekend. Hugs, Mickie:)

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  30. Oh Laura, You made me cry. Your post was so beautifully worded, and I do know exactly what you are feeling. I've already been there once with my daughter when she left for college at KU. I was lucky and she actually came back and has been here at home for the last year. Next month she, again, will be leaving for Kansas City to start 3 years of school to become a Physical Therapist. Such a sad time, but what a wonderful, new experience for both of them. Such is life. Have a wonderful Easter weekend. Hugs, Mickie:)

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  31. Dear Laura, the letting go is hard. With practice we discern when to step back...and when to step in. This "growing up" is a process that ebbs and flows as children spread their wings and mothers open their arms, to let go when it's time and to welcome home when that time comes too. Your heart will know, and your love will show you the way. Blessings to you ~


    * my word verification is "bless" *

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  32. Yes, letting go is hard, but it can grow into a beautiful, strong friendship. Your daughter is lovely, and I'm sure the other one who shuffles sleepily into your bedroom is too....

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  33. You've captured my heart. My daughter too leaves for college this fall and you're right, letting go is so hard. But exciting too, right? They will discover their passions and learn to fly! You're an amazing mom; she is blessed. Thank you for the Easter wishes. Warm wishes for a wonderful Passover to you.

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  34. OH! gosh! while I was reading this, you made me cry because I never had love from a mother. I have children now and I give all my love to them for I don't want them to experience the life that I had with my mother.

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  35. The pictures and the story you have told from the heart really touches home. For years I took rising 8th grade middle schoolers to England and France, and each year I had to reassure the parents I would care for their children as if they were my own. It was a wonderful experience for me and for the children and just this week I ran into one who herself is now a 6th grade English teacher and she told me what that trip meant to her. It will be OK. I promise you, and you daughter will return your same little girl but with so much more understanding of the world around her.

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  36. Oh - such a tender and beautiful post about your wonderful daughter... Her smile is more dazzling than the sun!

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  37. Difficult to let the children go, isn't it?! Thanks for your visit. Accidently I wrote something on Tammy's blog , sorry!about G-d's will and free will.
    Anyway have a great and beautiful weekend.
    Thanks for your visit.

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  38. This is a touching post. I well remember my daughter's first trip abroad and looking at colleges and now my baby girl has finished law school. Hard to believe. It is hard sending our moon beams off into the world but also nice having an adult daughter now. Your daughter is beautiful and from what you've said of her on your blog she carries that beauty inside too.

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  39. Your words brought tears to my eyes. Yes, letting go, is the hardest. I would look down and my hands would be gripping the steering wheel, I wasn't even thinking about it, (I thought.) If only we could always flow with life, for it is all planned by one greater than ourselves. And everything is perfect. We just have to remember.

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  40. I love your story and your pictures, especially the very last one!

    Rcel
    The Sky in my IDLENESS

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  41. It's really hard to let your children go, I remember that empty feeling well....

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  42. Hi Laura,

    I'm sorry it took me such a long while to get here. Easter, as you may imagine, is a very busy time at work for me and I've been a terrible commenter all week.

    I remember seeing my mom cry at the airport the first time my brother and I went on a 10 day vacation to California on our own...and she cried again ten years later when I left in a taxi to go to Italy on my own. Letting go will always be hard, but my mother did say that she was so proud of my being able to travel on my own, something that she never did...because we are both afraid of flying!!!

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  43. I appreciate and honor all the emotions you're feeling in this passage. My daughter is grown with her own two daughters, and I continue to be amazed at all that I don't know about this woman, my child, who I once knew everything about. There's a whole new passage of discovery as your daughter continues to evolve. Blessings on this journey.

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